He Reads My Mind

Your silent prayers uttered on tear-stained pillows were heard before they were said. Your deepest questions were answered before they were asked.

~Max Lucado

As I have been reading my bible more, I have had many questions pop up in my mind. How do we know what we are reading is valid? How can we trust the people who wrote the gospels? How do we know that what we are reading isn't just a legend? The questions go on and on. I was fascinated by the stories in the New Testament, but at the same time I was doubting its credibility. My faith was at a place it had never been before, but was my doubt outweighing my faith?

My twin and I have had a lot of "Jesus Talks" lately, but I never mentioned my doubts to her. One day while she was at her desk and I was laying on her bed (I usually just bust up into her room and hang out, most the time unwanted), I was telling her how I needed another book to read. She handed me "The Case for Christ" by Lee Strobel. She had never read the book, and I had never mentioned my doubt to her, but the book went hand-in-hand with what I was dealing with in my faith. Coincidence? No! God knew what I was dealing with in my mind, and placed the book to answer all my questions in my hand.

Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O Lord, you know it altogether.
~Psalms 139:4. 

As I dove into the book, the first chapter dealt with, "Can the biographies of Jesus be trusted?" This was the main question that I was asking. How could I know for sure that what I am reading is actually true? The answer was laid out plain and simple for me. God hit the nail on the head, and immediately gave the answer to the question I was asking.

In the book, Strobel breaks the case for Christ down in different forms of evidence. Each form of evidence approaches the credibility of the gospels in numerous directions. The book consist of different interviews from various intellectuals who provide factual information based on the type of evidence proposed by Strobel. Every question I seemed to conjure up in my mind was answered in the different forms of evidence. Whether it was a historical question about the reliability of the Gospels or about inconsistent verses within the different Gospels, the answers were provided for me. God knew where I was doubting, and He provided the answers.

Nothing in all creation is hidden from God's sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of Him to whom we must give account.
~Hebrew 4:13

It is amazing how God knows everything about us. Every thought in our mind, every move we make, and every sin we commit, He knows everything about us. Our God is omniscience! All the doubt that I once had that only I thought I knew, God revealed himself to me. God reads my mind, and He continues to reveal Himself to me.

Power of Prayer

Growing up I wasn't much of a prayer. I always peeked around while the pastor was praying, and sometime I would laugh during the prayer at someone around me. I was always scared to pray out loud like most people are. I did, however, say my prayers at night. I had the same prayer ever night, and every night it was a challenge to see how fast I could say it (as if the faster I said it, the faster God would answer it). "Hey God! Thank you for this day, and thank you for my friends and family. Amen!" Yep! Thats pretty deep stuff huh? I always thought that you had to bow your head and close your eyes in order for God to hear what you were saying, and I never had time to stop and do that, so I didn't pray. I didn't know exactly how to pray either. I mean, what am I suppose to say? I hear all these fancy prayers at church, but I can't do that; I have the vocabulary of a third grader. How the heck was I suppose to impress God with all the BIG words if I didn't know any BIG words.

At midwinter with BCM this past year, I remember I was shaken up after one of the bible studies Jonathan led. I remember Josh coming over to me after it was over and him telling me He felt like God had sent him over to talk to me. During that talk I remember Josh telling me that I just needed to pray. He said I wouldn't know exactly what I was saying and that sometime I would get sidetracked (and I definitely did), but to just try to focus and just talk to God. He said eventually I would know what I was asking God for and that I would grow in my prayer life. He definitely hit the nail on the head! I took his advice and just started praying. I would randomly start praying about anything and everything. I remember I even prayed for a caterpillar on the sidewalk one time. It was still hard to focus, and I would lose concentration right after I would say "Hey God" (I start all my prayers with Hey God.) With not being able to focus I didn't know what to do in order to keep my attention on God, so I did what one of my best friend Kristen did and started writing out my prayers in a prayer journal. This really helped me stay focused and I began to understand what I was saying and what it really meant to talk to the Lord. After a while my hand started hurting so I would just end the prayer really fast, but soon I was able to move from the prayer journal to just talking out loud, and I actually was able to pray and focus. It is awesome how God used Josh and Kristen to set the foundation for my prayer life and really teaching me how to pray. God used them to plant the seed for my prayer life, and then God definitely made that seed grow.

I was at my friend Caitlyn's dorm room last year, and on her door was Philippians 4:6. It says, "Don't worry about anything; pray about every!" Since I am a worry wart (from my previous blog), this verse really stuck out to me. It immediately became my favorite verse. Now every time I begin to worry, I think of this verse and immediately turn to God for help. This verse really taught me that I need to pray about everything. Whether it's about my health, my family, my friends, the random old lady who walked in on me using the bathroom last week (true story), or whatever else happened in my life, I just needed to pray about it. I pray all the time now. I have prayed at least ten times already while writing this blog. While driving to Josh's ordination service, I remember I would pray for every car that I passed on the road - I prayed that God would teach some of those people how to drive! The importance of prayer really started to become known to me.

As I was reading my bible tonight, I came across one of the parables that Jesus tells His disciples that teaches us to never give up in prayer and to stay in constant prayer. In Luke 18:1-8, Jesus tells a story about a widow who constantly goes to a judge about "appealing for justice against someone who had harmed her" (1:3). The judge eventually granted her request because "she is wearing [him] out with her constant prayer" (1:5) This parable teaches us that we must constantly pray to our Father because "even the evil judge rendered a just decision in the end, so surely God would give justice to His chosen people who plead with him day and night?" (1:8)  If we stay in constant prayer, God will answer us according to His plan. We shouldn't give up if our prayers are not answered immediately, but we should "keep praying" (1 Thessalonians 5:17). I pray for the same things everyday because I have faith that God will hear my request. There are some prayer request that I will not actually see God answer -my prayer request for Costa Rica- but I have faith that God is going to answer them, and I am going to keep praying those prayers everyday.

I remember several years ago at a youth retreat I received a wrist band that had the acronym PUSH on it. The acronym stood for Pray Until Something Happens. With my prayer life where it is now, I am starting to realize how important this really is. We shouldn't give up if our prayers aren't answered as soon as we pray about them, but instead we should pray until something happens. God wants to answer our request, and God wants to hear our request, so it would be crazy to just give up on praying so soon.

My faith life has grown tremendously over the past few weeks, and I have discovered the power of prayer. I have seen God answer some of my prayers, and it is so awesome seeing the ways God answers them. God has given me the spiritual gift of prayer, and He is using that gift to His glory. I am on the prayer team for BCM this upcoming school year, and I am so excited to see what God has in store for that team. He has opened doors for me with my prayer life, and it is great how one day I don't even know how to pray, to praying all the time and really just carrying a conversation with God. God has really shown me through friends and scripture the importance and power of prayer. 

I am praying for each person who reads this. I encourage whoever is reading this to just take a few moments or even a few hours right now and just pray. Spend that one-on-one time with God and just confess to Him, praise Him, and lift up your request to Him. He is wanting to hear what you have to say, and God is the perfect listener, so why not talk to Him? Prayer works.

Keep on praying! (1 Thessalonians 5:17)